| 關於那些我曾聽過的遺憾愛情
作者／薄荷糖
年輕的時候，我曾經聽過一個當時覺得遺憾的愛情。
他帥氣多金卻也風流放蕩，別的女人總是看見眼前的風光，卻極少人窺知背後的那個她美麗聰慧溫柔賢淑，卻顯得百般委屈，陪他走過年少最困頓的日子，陪他勇闖天涯創造夢想，卻同樣也陪著那風雨飄搖的愛情，任他來來去去進入穿梭在他、自己和別人的愛情裏。
後來，我聽說他停泊了下來，明白誰是最愛的人，為她戴上了婚戒，只是後來的後來，更聽說了他們玩著各自屬於自己的愛情遊戲，她的愛戀她的單純早已經被傷害給沖散隱藏了起來，剩下寂寞的洞，不知道什麼可以被填補，而他說自己已經擁有過她最美的愛就足夠了，其他的都是遊戲和難以拋棄的樂趣。
那年未滿二十的我，聽得淚眼相對，不能相信那也是愛情的一種，而今經過歲月的洗禮，在嘆息裏我開始懂得其中的心酸，愛情它從來不是承諾和相守而已，曾經的心碎矇住了最初的自己，讓值得兩個字找不到意義。
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從前覺得男人的眼淚比女人來得動容珍貴。
不過，當他說她終於承受不了這樣一成不變的問題轉身走了後（然而，人常態性的改變也是一成不變的一種），才第一次發現原來哭也可以這麼沒有聲音，卻難過地連呼吸都喘不過來，那個一向認為沒有正常人情感的自己。
我才發現，男人的眼淚往往是來不及的懊悔，建立在女人極度心碎和千百顆珍珠落下到連血也不剩後。
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相戀多年，他一朝未曾預料的背叛，就要遠離完美的她，完美不代表深愛，心裏另外有個值得楚楚可憐的女孩。
而她還記得自己的完美堅強全面而垮的模樣，那些脆弱的心傷，都成了他不能負擔的東施效顰，而他口口聲聲說都愛，卻在所有相背的瑣碎時間急奔到另個她面前。
她撐起最後完美轉身的那夜，他卻開了口兼發誓從此停泊，只是原因不是愛，年齡不容人浪費時間、更無法勇敢選擇不完美，心膽怯地為自己挑選了最適合生活的伴。
我擁過著泣不成聲的她，那股絕望至今仍穿越過手心，只是她最後仍是沒有動身，和他過著從此不能碰觸信任的日子，她的話還留在空氣裏，只要妳不再把注意力放在他身上，與不再觸碰關於信任的問題，那兩個人依然可以互相陪伴過生活，那聲音清楚冷靜，卻感染了我的淚腺，曾經相知的愛情它在哪呢。 |
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|  我和老婆的情侶眼鏡..超可愛~!
 有人死不陪我喝酒..搞的我們在路邊當台妹><
 老婆大歡唱..我看起來比老婆還high也..哈哈
 再一張老婆深情照~
     我和寶貝白吃照~挖哈哈..超搞笑..
在愛情裡，你是俘虜還是惡魔？
小馬一直有偷吃的習慣，有次劈腿被Tina抓包，小馬向Tina下跪，告訴她這是第一次劈腿，以後不會再發生劈腿事件了。Tina看他如此誠懇也就沒繼續追究，並且決定再給他一次機會。那可憐的女朋友，她不知道其實小馬已經劈腿好幾次了，只是這一回一口氣交了三個女朋友，忙得不可開交，所以才會被正牌女朋友抓包，但是小馬的說謊演技很好，也讓Tina相信他是初次犯錯。
後來Tina沒有因為小馬劈腿事件而變得疑神疑鬼，反而一如往昔的過生活，但就因為如此，小馬抵擋不了花花世界的誘惑且一直找機會劈腿，最後變本加厲，說謊成家常便飯，Tina的生活常常都被第三者騷擾，甚至還造成Tina工作上的不便，到後來Tina失望透頂，提出好幾次分手協議，一開始小馬因為男性尊嚴個性好強，不肯接受Tina分手決定，到最後兩人鬧得不愉快分道揚鑣。那一次戀愛，Tina用了五年青春在小馬身上，Tina的朋友知道後，有些人是安慰她，也有些人指責她笨。因為把信任當作愛情首位條件，卻得到男朋友的背叛，Tina認為花了五年時間才了解什麼叫做愛情，這時間的確有點久。
我舉這例子都是想說愛情力量很偉大，它有無形的力量讓我們去包容另一半的缺點，有時候也讓我們忽略一些事情的真面目，這股力量讓人變得盲目看不到真實。倘若有天失去愛的力量，一切突然覺醒，才會回頭檢視愛情過去的點點滴滴。不過也是有人明知道另一半對自己不忠，仍然選擇做愛情俘虜，相信「只要堅持下去，未來他就是我的」的想法，不斷對自己洗腦。
我看到很多結婚十幾年的夫妻或是交往十幾年的情侶，到最後不歡而散，那些失戀的人都會說：「我忍了他（她）好久了，我終於解脫了！」如果可以及早發現自己不適合對方，我想是不是更應該快刀斬亂麻，別拖到人老珠黃或小孩子都生出來了，才決定要開始自己另一種人生。請記得不要讓過度的容忍來造就你（妳）日後不愉快的生活。
在愛情裡，你是俘虜還是惡魔？
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| i never knew how you feel..cuz i can't tell..
u've always told me that you love me..but i can't feel...
u told me u are shy..u told me u are willing to give up everything just for me..
but..y is it still not enough??y can't i just love u??
something is missing...something is not right...what is it???
i don't know..maybe it's "you" that's the problem....
PS:man..i love my layout..so cute!!haha..have been looking for this for so long.. |
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| no matter what i do...they are always disappointed..
even i made a little mistakes..they made a "whole" big deal out of it..
i am not perfect..so is everyone....
it's not i never tried..i tried so hard to communicate with them, and tell them what i really want..
but they are still the same...it's always my fault..
i know i am the daughter..i need to follow what they said..
but what if i am not happy??what if i just feel too pressure that sometimes i just need to have my own space.
yeah!!space??haha..they told me i don't need any space..and they told me they didn't even put any pressure on me...it's ME that's the problem.
yeah..it's always my problem..always my fault..my friends are always too BAD for me...and i always was a "goodie goodie" before..and my BAD friends changed me...they turned me into this ugly brat...
i am not perfect!!everbody needs friends..ppl chose ppl that they want to hang out with and have the same interest with...it's natural..why can't they understand??why do they have to tell me who i should hang out with??and who i should be friends with...
i've always understand that they are just trying to do and tell what's the best for me...b/c i am their daughter..
but seriously..it's just too much..
wtever they said, i don't agree. wtever i said, they forever disagree.
i am not saying all these is their fault..all i want is one thing..just please try to "understand" me...the me who i really am...
i do know that i lied..i hurt their feelings..but..nobody ever really wanted to lie about anything...
but..to me, it always seems like i have no choice..so, to me...lying is the "only" way OUT!!
i am sorry that i lied..but..every times i got the guts to speak out and told them how i reli felt inside of me..
all i got from them is an argument..there's always an argument...nobody wants to draw back....
sigh~!!i am truely very tired of all these..i feel like prisioner again...i never said anything..it's not because of i don't care..it's because of that i dont' ever want to have the same feelings back in high school, cring everything single night..wishing my life could just end like this...
just don't want to think about all these things anymore..they are just sooooo messed up!!
i just want to be happy and be myself..maybe that sounds selfish..but..i think i really can't deal with these anymore.
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| 今天又決定要染頭髮了..
只因為daisy的一句"寶貝阿><我覺得你咖啡頭髮比較正!!"
唉~!!我就是一個善變的女人..黑髮才染完不久...現在又忍不住要換頭髮的顏色了...
不過這樣也好...想轉換一下心情囉...或許染了頭髮以後...
我對自己也有另一種看法囉...
不過現再有點擔心一件事..那就是..
hmmmmmmm...我很怕髮色上不去..因為之前染黑過..
o do ke o do ke???(怎麼辦in korean)...
sigh..we will see!!! |
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